Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Fiona Walsh, ersthwhile penpusher, penny pincher and pound stretcher (and gubernatorial and presidential candidate) claims she has the insider truth on two of Hollywoods most controversial stars. She claims that Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas and Kirstie Alley are secretly related to each other. "I'm 100% sure of it - sure isn't one the spitting image of the other - will ya look? I'm not sure what the familial lineage is - could be twins or maybe even Fergie is Kirsties lovechild, conceived when she was in her fatter days and could hide her pregnancy more easily or in a Scientology-induced fog. The kicker would be if we found out that Fergie was also a Scientologist - that would be the cincher! God I'm brilliant at this!" Fergie and Alley were not available for comment but Alley was seen heading into a burger joint for some possible "consolation food".