Monday, September 26, 2005

JLo's Watches catch Walsh's eye!
Following the recent appearance of new fur-trimmed J.Lo watches, Fiona Walsh, presidential candidate and tippling temp is set to launch her own line of fashion accessories. "I thought to myself, 'why should J.Lo have all the fur-trimmed fun? I'll start a line of useless accessories myself but instead of baby rabbits and mangled foxes, I'll use bits of J.Lo's human detritus". Inspired by Ms. Lopez's success Walsh is planning to debut her new line of fashion handbags trimmed with Ms. Lopez's hair brushing left overs and cut fingers nails. Probed for answers on how she came by the delicious divas bodily bits, Walsh would only say, "I have my sources. I can't say or I would be strung up in court but suffice to say I have an "in". Plus at a recent PETA protest, I managed to grab a handful of her hair as she walked by outside. That served me nicely for the lining of a new cosmetic hold-all!". Plus at least my line doesn't cost the lives of the millions of poor abused animals used in the fur industry. You can call me all the names you like but I'm not a fur hag begob!" Asked what was next, Walsh hinted at "a new line of comfy slippers using J.Lo's pubic hair. That'll be hard one and because she's so neat, and not easy to come by but I'm working on it!".

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