Thursday, April 14, 2005

Walsh sends photos to the troops!
Following the splendid example of stick insect/actress Brittany Murphy, Fiona Walsh, 2008 presidential candidate and enthusiastic employee has offered up tasteful photos of herself for the troops in Iraq. "It's the least I could so", said the flat-arsed desk jockey. "They need all the support and cheer they can get and I for one am proud to do my part. When "Maximus" asked me to get into a string bikini, I had no hesitation. Never mind that I was on the rag and feeling a bit bloated, I thought it all the more reason to have the snaps taken, as it would be a gentle reminder of what they are missing back home". Walsh who fiercely defended the use of an airbrush on her buttocks went onto say, "At one stage in the shoot, I accidentally (phnarr, phnarr!) dropped by bikini top - after all a little extra titillation doesn't hurt. But the photographer insisted I cover up immediately. I can understand, he wanted to keep it clean and not annoy the Iraqi mullahs who would probably be censoring what gets into the country. But I thought I heard him mutter the word 'pendulous' - what does that mean?". The U.S. Army refused to commment on the rumor that the photos had been returned to "Maximus" offices, citing "security concerns".

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